Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Imperfect Writing


I haven't edited this. It's rough and impromptu and I wrote it in an editor that doesn't try to catch mistakes. I haven't even read it over a second time. I'm pretty sure that there's holes in the logic and bad spelling and bad paragraphs and awful sentences. You know what though? Given the topic, I don't care. Maybe one day I'll take this post and scrub it up and make an essay of it. Probably not though. Enjoy the imperfection. I'll take the time that I didn't spend on it to write something that I care about more.
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I haven't blogged here for a very long time. I suppose I didn't want to. I don't blog often, and I when I do there's something romatic about blogging on whathowadsworth.com as Jason Secrest the transdimensional owner of a randomly magical mansion. Moreover I've felt like I've been promoting a kind of a false sense of truth, like that harbored by William Goldman in his novels by S. Morgenstern. It's fun to say that "This is the truth, a hard to believe truth, but a real one." I guess that I've felt that I'd be betraying my lies if I ever wrote something as myself, just a guy in provo that wishes that he transported to a mystical mansion at a whim. I don't know what I'm so worked up about it for. It's not like truth and fiction in this matter aren't seperable and obvious. At anyrate, I did want to touch on something in the art of writing. It's something that I've been trying to work out in my head for the last several month's - and when I say trying to work out, what I really mean is avoiding... but an epiphony struck me today, and I'm gonig to do my best to iterate it.

Imperfection is the topic of the day. Imperfection is what really get's at my writing. It's my biggest hangup. When I don't write, it's because I'm scared that what I write won't "work."  I suppose to understand what I mean by that we should back up a touch and go over afew principles of fiction. Specifically, let's talk about the Willing Suspension of Disbeleif. Coolridge, a contemporary of William Wordsworth invented that term. Willing suspension of disbelief is what people do when they want to enjoy a work of fiction. They find it in themselves to say, "Well that couldn't really happen, but just for now I'll pretend that it could." Then they read a work and digest it and pull bits of insights about life and the universe from a story that they knew was fake from the beggining, but that they pretended was true.

The problem with fiction is that it has to sell its lies. A person has to almost consiously declare that they are willing to overlook things that it finds illogical, or "wrong" about a story as they read, but the more frequently they have to do this (and the less intentional the lie they swallow seems) the harder it is to accept the lie and read on. The thing that keeps them "suspended" in a willing self dilusion is the promise of reward. They need a profound thought, or an identifiable situation, or a clever phrase, or a satisfying interaction with something in the book.  They're like miners, chipping through the face of the lies. At first they only need little traces of a vein of gold, but as they go they need more and more until they hit the motherload. Then the book was worth it.

What I'm driving at is that readers are tough customers and they notice everything that's wrong, and to much of what's wrong and to little reward leads them to put the book down. People balk at a phrase that's off or a reaction to a problem that seems stupid, or a bit of plot that twists in a way that doesn't seem believable within the bounds of their current suspension of disbelief.

That's what's killing me right now. I notice what's wrong with my book. I notice what's illogical. Then, what I don't notice, my friends pick up on when they read for me. Then all I can see is what's wrong. I have a hard time believing that the rewards of what I'm delivering exceeds the effort of reading it. So I'm scared of my book or scared of my blog, and I start to dread writing it and then I stop writing, and I come up with excuses not to do it.

For me, the art of learning how to write, is the art of understanding that all the best works are flawed.

I watched the BBC program Sherlock. Love it. Great series. But their's so much wrong with it. I'm just going to take one example of this: Season one throws out a pretty big cliffhanger that at the end. They stopped in the middle of a scene in fact. Season 2 picked up exactly at the same spot and resolved the immediate problem. It was aweful. It did not work for me at all. Or maybe I'm just stupid and I didn't observe whatever clever interplay that the screne writers thought that they'd made obvious. The funny thing is that after struggling through that stupid scene, I didn't care about it. I shrugged it off and giggled my delight at the next scene. Especially after that aweful bit of plot, I was on the edge of my seat wating for sherlock to say something rediculous, or explain away the stain on somebodies shirt.

I've got to get past the idea that all of the wholes in my fiction need to be plugged. It'd take a much more clever person than I to get everything about it perfectly right. The whole thing is a lie after all. It's my job to write the story the best that I can, polish it within an inch of it's life, and then release it into the wild. These first couple of books are going to be pretty aweful, but I've got to get past my fear of writing them and just finish. The next one's will be better. And the next few after that will be better still, and the next few even better.

So, it's on that note, that I'm going to shake off my fear of writing crap and finish this stupid book.

-Jason

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Schlange has died, but Wadsworth lives.

What ho! What ho! What ho!

Transition complete. I'm no longer posting as Schlange A. Taube. Sad, I know, but I think it was necessary. Also, I disappointed myself in that I have not posted at all since CONduit despite the resolution to go over a topic a day. In other and better news, I've started up "The Mansion House" (www.whathowadsworth.blogspot.com). The good news is that I've felt driven to work on it regularly. We'll see how long that lasts. Hopefully a good long while as I kind of live there now.

-Jason

Saturday, May 29, 2010

CONduit XX: Day 2

Today's conduit was pretty fantastic. We went to the following panels: Riding the Rocket(surviving career blastoff); Writing for YA Audiences; The Mike Show (a Q&A); Writing Excuses; Series vs. Standalone; and Writing the Rogue.

Everything was pretty great. I enjoyed all the panels and found some time to rub shoulders with Authors. I also spent too much money on books and got them all signed. In the process I also made a connection with Dan Wells. He's going to send me some of his current writing to help me understand a concept for something I'm writing. The only thing it costs me is to send him feedback on what he sends me (not that I feel qualified)...

I took pretty decent notes, and i think that to help me blog, I'm going to try to go over something that stood out to me every day. That'll help me solidify it at the same time it helps me be in the habit of doing better at blogging.

I got some great tips on how to tackle being stuck in my writing (don't call it writer's block... apparently that doesn't exist).

Here's the three opinions I got on the phenomenon hitherto known as 'writers block':
-Paul Genesse:You aren't prepared in one of two ways: 1.) You're not refreshed. You physically or emotionally cannot write because of whatever reason. Take some time to recharge and try again. 2.)You don't know where the story is going. Take some time to plan or plot or map or work on an outline.

-James Dashner: You aren't in the right mood. Get in the right mood. Go see a movie. Dashner says that some of his best writing happens in his car or the closest coffee shop immediately after he gets out of a movie.

-Barbara Hambly: There are two kinds of writers block (she can call it that, she's old school) Really there's either something wrong with you or something wrong with your story. 1.) Clinical Depression: you just can't get up to do your writing. Seek professional help and try again. 2.)You took a wrong turn at a crossroads in your story. Maybe you gave out too much information or approached a scene from a perspective that doesn't work very well. Go back to a point where the story was working and figure out where it stopped. Try a different route with the story and see if you can take it farther.

Another approach suggested by Barbara was to make a timeline. Figure out exactly what happened on days one two three four and five, where day three is the day you're stuck on. She had to do that a lot when writing mystery, and found that it also helped her to write when it was difficult.

That's it for conduit today.

I've got a couple other projects I'm working on. I own some web space (I'm not linking to it because there's nothing there to see) and I'm going to start trying to turn it into a toolbox of useful resources. For example, several helpful web pages got suggested to me at conduit and I'm going to put up the links there. Maybe when it starts looking like it's something worth your time I'll put up a pointer to it from here.

Also, I'm going to start a new blog, wherein I'll have little bits of dialog with my characters. It'll be great exercise for me, and hopefully entertaining for everybody else. Watch for a link to that soon.

-Jason

...so much for gradually killing Shlange... oh well. He'll live on in our hearts. At least until I kill him off by changing my profile name.

Friday, May 28, 2010

CONduit XX: More than just strange capitalization

So, some of you know that I'm an aspiring author. My writing group and I signed up to attend CONduit XX: Space Pirates of CONduit. Arg. It's my first con (convention) ever and thus far it's been a positive experience.

For me, and many like me, becoming a space pirate is only a matter of wearing a green name tag. For many others it's a matter of costuming unparalleled by even the hardiest trick-or-treaters. While I didn't see any storm troopers, there were a large variety of persons bringing fiction to life in the form of: a bum knight with cardboard sign reading "will slay dragon for food"; a peasant; a sword wielding white man turned jet black, a member of the Jedi council; a fencer; and a wide variety of things that could only have been costumed in the similitude of something fiercely anime. All of these, besides the regular con activities, also came for to filk and to attend the masquerade. And who knows, maybe they all had a grand larp.

"Filk is a musical culture, genre, and community tied to science fiction/fantasy fandom and a type of fan labor. The genre has been active since the early 1950s, and played primarily since the mid-1970s. The term (originally a typographical error) antedates 1955." -wikipedia entry: filk music


I'm not sure where the majority of these filkers went to when I sat in on the panels where writing advice was proffered. My best guess is that they dissolved into the ether wherein they floated about haunting us with ocasional bursts of not so distant song. The filking songs are not a thing to be trifled with. They, the songs of the filkers, did a number on one of the panels. From the depths of the nearest "cheery dungeon," or "den of happy evil" or "illy concealed transdimensional mana plain," or whatever other illogical-meeting-place-of-all-that-is-both-off-key-and-fictional that they chose to inhabit, the filkers raised their voices in the greatest interruption that the panel on genocide was able to endure. Though their voices found me, I opted not to go find them. Whatever their location, it like Camelot before it, "is a silly place."

It was great to attend the panels, where I learned from several published authors (both full time and with day jobs) about how to write moods, how to increase my chances of getting published, why and how to consider geographical layout when writing, etc. Even better, I got a chance to rub shoulders with a few of them. Larry Corriea let me pester him for a while, and so did John Brown.

Larry was self published for a while but got picked up by Bane. When they published his book, Monster Hunter, it was wildly successful. This makes him one of the happy few success from self publishing. John Brown wrote a book called Servant of a Dark God and with it won "Best Speculative Fiction" in the whitney awards. He was pitted against Brandon Sanderson, James Dashner, Dan Wells, and Aprilynne Pike. (As of today, after meeting John, I've met and shaken hads with all of the afore mentioned, with the exception of Pike. I'm suddenly feeling pretty privileged.) While we chattered they made a lot of great points. One of them is that it's helpful to have a pre-built audience, aka an internet following, aka a bunch of people that will read your blog. That's why I'm blogging again, though in something of an overwhelmed manner. Larry gave me a "low" target for a helpful readership: 4000. I'm about one four-thousandth of my way to the goal, and with few exceptions anyone who's ever read my blog is already the kind of friend that would buy my book with out my blog, just to be supportive. Ah well... time for consistant blogging - and looking to get in with Larry so he'll link to my site (the more premade the audiance, the better... drawing from his ample following sounds ultra sweet.)

However, before I start printing out cards with this URL, or leaching favors off of people who've made it, I need to seriously look over the site and give it a little more spit polish. Maybe I need to get a few more blogs under my belt too. Finally, I need to update my name. While writing as Schlang as been a fun adventure, it's not likely to help me get published as J. L. Secrest. I'm loath to leave behind the personification of harmless wisdom, so I may take some time to transition. We'll see.

Anyhow, CONduit has been a lot of fun. I'm meeting people that are already famous (L.E. Modesitt was at a few panels today), and others that I'm pretty sure are soon to be. It's cool to learn more about their personalities and how they write and what their obsessions are. Now I just need to take their thoughts and see what works for me and my humanity loving super butler.

Tomorrow should be a blast, and at the signings I'm going to spend way more money on books than should be legal. Funny, I thought the whole point of this was to help me MAKE money. Maybe it will come through Karma, or networking, or maybe just an act of God. Any combination of the above is welcome.

One last thing. One little test. Larry says that authors are narcissists (I believe him on that count, I'm pretty narcissistic myself), and Google themselves to see what people are saying about them and their work. In theory he'll find himself here, and leave a comment.

Here's another test. Brandon Sanderson is going to be at CONduit tomorrow. He should Google his name and read here that I want him to bring my final submission from his class with him. Brandon, I know you're a busy dude, but Wadsworth is aching to know how he did. Actually, that's a lie. Wadsworth is a pillar of calm. I'm the one in turmoil.

-Schlange

Resurrection? We'll see...

To my esteemed friends, enemies, followers, cohorts, and associates:

You may note that the last time I posted was almost 2 years ago. Fail. Recent events have told me that I should blog. I'm going to try to get back in the habit. Win.

That is all.

P.S.Maybe I'm gonna start blogging with my real name. It could become important for me. We'll see.

-Schlange

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Colbert meets the Cookie Monster!

Monday, February 23, 2009

A Poem

And now, a short poem:

I had not time to make a sound
Nor did I move my eyes,
A coiled viper struck me down!
It took me by surprise.

Revenge I took, in passive ways-
Revenge! In perfect pose!
The odor of my skin did shock
and infiltrise its nose.

Snakes have dim eyes - with tongue they see
and taste, in part, is smell.
What my attacker licked and sniffed
has shot its sight to hell!

Wise and harmless 'twas it not,
Perhaps it shall now be be...
My unbathed body struck it blind
for now it cannot see.

Should our long dead friend Kipling want to make some sort of memorable short story with a moral out of that, I give my full permission.

-Schlange A. Taube